I've found it! The root cause of the problems.

After feedback, and much great personal inner reflection upon current events, I think I've found the major problem with the world.
Quite possibly it is The Problem. Ya know the one problem that is responsible (ripple style) for all other problems.

But lets start where the revelation occurred.

On an accidental trip to IMDB, there it was!
They are remaking one of the greatest films ever made.
A true classic among classics.
True Grit! With Jeff Bridges as Rooster!!!!!!!!!!
Are you as thrilled as I am? Probably not, and your admission to this is what led to my great revealing.

The root cause of all the world's problems is...... (drum roll) ....... People that don't agree with me.
More specifically when they don't like the exact same things and/or hate the exact same things.

So as I was on the hunt for someone to show the proper level of awe for this upcoming cinematic epicness, I got a little frustrated.

Are we rollin' downhill like a snowball headed for Hell? Great song

Ahh... Merle Haggard.... What the!... Oh! Hey
Sorry, I thought you might have been a pack of slightly agitated, potentially aggravated, and absolutely intimidated rabid chinchillas.

Tonight, minions, we shall be talking about politics. Why, Barrack Obama. Sort of

Let me explain. Our president tweeted the following last night:

"The other side is counting on you staying home this Nov. They’re counting on your silence. They are betting on your apathy. Prove them wrong"

It irritated me because it calls Republicans "The other side". I mean don't get me wrong, I dislike Republicans as much as, if not more, than the next guy, but I don't like making them out to be the enemy. Sure they are the opposite side of the coin from the Democrats but we're all on the same sinking ship.

Now before my political beliefs are incorrectly inferred, I dislike Democrats almost as much as Republicans.

So I want to take the soapbox and say that we all need to work together to keep the fat lady from singing.

But Americans are a little reluctant to sign on to anything without imagery. So I've been doing what I call Experiments For The Betterment of Society. But what my critics call "Abominations". But what do they know. My first... um... trial run was using actual politicians. I gave the world Bill-john McClinton.



When he started eating illegal immigrants, I got a lot of praise from the Right, but he nonetheless had to be put down. All evidence has been destroyed though, so I can wash my hands clean.



I switched to raiding circuses for volunteers and came up with the perfect symbol to unify Americans, bring this country to full world dominance!

Ladies and Gentlemen I give you ....
The Republocrat!

I'm Back Bitches (and Bastards, Respectively)!

How Long has it been? A question I dare not dig through the annals for a legitimate answer. But the important thing is that I am here, for today at least.
Why all of sudden? Maybe its the large amounts of George Carlin I've been ingesting, or the excessive amounts of Richard Pryor I've inhaled lately. Or maybe It's being told something is off limits for comedy!
Censorship... My old nemesis, we meet again. Especially when I find the subject completely within reason. But I think we'll just come back to that. First lets get re-acquainted.
How have you been? That's cool
Oh, is she better? That's good to hear.
Where's he workin' now? Good money? Yup, yup. It's hard times.

Ok! now that that's outta the way... Sorry, I wasn't really listening... just kidding, I'm not sorry.

In the mean time, I've seen movies and concerts, they were good but I didn't write reviews, and I don't know why. I've been in a sort of brain-block mode. But Today....

Here it is, in the spirit of my comedy heroes, your anecdote of the day.

I walk in to this prison-camp called work, this morning. And I'm struck speechless. A female coworker got a haircut. A haircut very similar to another (male) coworker's haircut. So I say "Did you guys plan this?" So I get pulled aside and told "She's been getting a lot of flack for that so don't be mean".

If the haircut is offend-able then don't cut your hair that way! If I walk down the street wearing a three sizes too small ninja turtle shirt and a banana hammock, I'm gonna expect jokes. I would wear pants if I didn't want jokes. But I chose the man-thong! I'm embracing the man-thong! If I don't feel bad about it, somebody remarking on it shouldn't hurt me right? Damn Skippy!

If you don't want someone to say a man-thong looks funny, don't wear a man thong. If you're offended, it obviously can't be liked by you that much. That's all I'm saying. People need to toughen up. If I like someone, I joke with them. If somebody finds my shenanigans hurtful... Just know I think you're cool, but your haircut is retarded.

Oh and here is a pic of me, Carlin, and Pryor.... Damn we was old then. Enjoy